In February 2023, at the Dalai Lama’s Dharamsala temple in India, 100 students watched the spiritual leader kiss a young boy on the lips. Following this already questionable act, he requested the child suck his tongue. Thankfully, the suggestion ended there, and nobody sucked anyone’s tongue; otherwise, that would have mutated into an even more appalling story.
Regardless, this exchange was captured on film and seized global attention in April. Understandably, the repercussions have been snappy and loud. Accusations of child abuse scream from one side. Defences of cultural differences counter from the other. So what are we to think? To figure that out, let’s take a step back and carefully investigate this situation piece by piece.
Who is the Dalai Lama?
The Dalai Lama is not a person but a title given to the Tibetan Buddhist leader. Currently, His Holiness Tenzin Gyatso holds the position, the 14th to do so. Think of him as the Pope within his religious sect. And if we ignore recent events, we can appreciate Tenzin Gyatso as a globally revered figure, loved for his bubbly personality and peaceful sentiments. He received the Nobel Peace Prize in 1989 and the US Congressional Gold Medal in 2006.
Why Are People Upset?
That’s fairly obvious. No matter your stance, asking a child to suck on your tongue is a bad look. It also reflects negatively on religious leaders as a whole, as the Catholic church still struggles with similar contexts. Consequently, this incident has proven particularly triggering for those who are dealing with past trauma. The media has frequently used words like “inappropriate” and “disgusting” to describe the scene, leading some to believe that the Dalai Lama’s reputation may be permanently damaged.
Is It Just a Cultural Thing?
Defenders have leapt to Gyatso’s aid, scrambling examples of how the West has perverted an otherwise innocent interaction. Thus far, the most popular excuse has come in the form of “tongue greetings”.
According to folklore tales, a 9th-century king named Langdarma was infamously cruel to his people. Legend tells that Langdarma’s defining characteristic was his black tongue, so after he died, civilians aimed to thwart his reincarnation by checking for this distinctive attribute. Hence, exposing your normal-coloured tongue proved your innocence, which persisted as a fun greeting still practised today.
Critics note that this story fails to mention any sucking.
Vice Magazine investigated further. Their findings claim that a common Tibetan joke is “Che le sa”, which is closer translated to “Eat my tongue”. It is an expression usually used to tease children after feeding them a piece of candy. Some supporters have offered an extended interpretation to read as: “I’ve given you everything, so the only thing left is for you to eat my tongue” .
Is This the Dalai Lama’s First Trouble With Western Media?
It’s certainly his most alarming, but not his first. On several occasions over the last decades, His Holiness has been asked whether the Dalai Lama could ever be rebirthed as a female. He has responded, “Certainly, if that would be more helpful,” but foolishly likes to add that she should be attractive. Naturally, these careless remarks were highlighted as sexism and appeared incongruous with the Lama’s general “beauty comes from within” sentiments. However, the initial conversation was with the then-Paris editor of Vogue magazine. According to His Holiness’ official website, he was “responding to the unfamiliar ambience of working with a team whose prime focus was the world of high fashion”.
During the recent tongue controversy, another video resurfaced. Here, the Dalai Lama is seen tickling Lady Gaga’s leg. She seems uncomfortable with the touch. Those wielding pitchforks and torches have used this to fuel their fire, painting the leader as a longtime sex pest. However, other comments remark on his childlike silliness, as if harmlessly oblivious as to how unenlightened adults behave in public.
What Was the Dalai Lama’s Response?
His Holiness wasted no time and formally apologised. His official statement expressed sorrow “for the hurt his words may have caused” and that “he regrets the incident”.
The Family’s Response
There is a noted silence from the parents. However, in an interview with Voice of Tibet radio station, the boy in question called the meeting a “good experience” with a lot of “positive energy”. One can only imagine how confusing it must be for a child caught up in this media uproar.
What Does China Have to Do with It?
China claims Tibet as part of its territory. The Dalai Lama has long advocated greater freedom or even independence for the region. A brutal conflict took place in 1959 (known as the Tibetan Uprising), where thousands of Tibetans were slaughtered. His Holiness was forced into exile, and China continues to pursue new ways to discredit his name. Consequently, the political head of the Central Tibetan Administration, Penpa Tsering, blames “pro-Chinese sources” for weaponising the video, pushing it in the ugly direction it has fallen.
What Should We Think?
The important word here is “think”. Too often, the public’s conditioned minds are hasty to leap in whatever direction serves their predefined opinions. Fans of the Dalai Lama assume the man can do no wrong and will safeguard his honour even if it means enforcing excuses for dubious conduct. On the other side, the fangs of cancel culture are forever salivating, bloodthirsty and eager to tear anybody down at the slightest whiff of uncertain objectives.
No one can deny that the Dalai Lama should have known better. As a global role model, such actions can normalise problematic adult-child relations, and we must be wary of that. But if the Dalai Lama’s playful demeanour runs on complete sexual naivety, then it is the accusers who are sexualising the boy and ruining an otherwise festive exchange between two people’s lives.
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